Category Archives: dramaqueen

Transition

by Ashley Posted on January 31, 2013


A photo I took when I was 16 (!). Feels really appropriate right now. (I also tried it in black and white, but it made it look like I was dead, lol. A little bit too sinister for my taste.)

When I look around me I’m surrounded by boxes. Boxes filled with all of my (our) earthly belongings, of which I did not know I had so many (note to self: do not buy anymore cute cups!!!) and filled with even more memories. When I decided to quit my job and we decided to move back to our hometown (ehm, yes it was in consensus you guys, I promise), I did not exactly know what it meant. I saw it as a way of “going back” and getting some peace of mind, if only for a few months. No longer an expensive monthly rent to pay and finally an end to almost four years of going back and forth. During these four years we always kept visiting our family or wanted to simply unwind during our weekends in our small town, which meant a lot of living out of our suitcases.

Now I see these boxes and I feel that it’s about more than that. When I think about the past four years I just see one big blur and I realize that I need this break before I’ll start something new in the fall. My parents’ divorce, my studies, the jobs I’ve had, the people I’ve met, the trips, me living abroad… it all happened in four years. Only four. It feels like a thousand. And I’ve changed so much. Now I no longer see this as a way of going back. I see this is a way of going forward, as a transition. I want to spend more time with my family, be there for my sister, have cozy nights with my friends, be more creative with photography and other stuff (I love to cook!) and just “live”. I no longer want to have the feeling I don’t have time for anything. I no longer want to keep running.

Anyway, before I have to make a whole new category for this post because a simple “dramaqueen” is no longer sufficient enough (and I haven’t even talked about my amazing boyfriend yet!!!! Can you imagine), let me get to the practical side of things: I’m moving this weekend and after that I’ll probably will not have a internet-connection at home for at least two weeks. I know myself, so I’ll probably find ways to go online anyway (crossing my fingers for an unsecured wireless connection in the area as we speak…), but yes… while I do not have the illusion that the world will stop turning without a blogpost from me, I just wanted to let you know about it and explain the silence around here (if there is any).

On a second note: I’m thinking about moving to blogger, but it turns out to be a bit more challenging than I thought… I’ll keep you posted.

Take care ❤ (and a big thank you! – I don’t say this often enough, but I appreciate every single one of you)

Posted in daily musings, dramaqueen | 31 Comments

The troubles of journalling

by Ashley Posted on January 24, 2013

Some people think blogging is a foolish thing. Writing about yourself on the internet and sharing you life with complete strangers?! They have a point of course. Why not use a regular journal, just for your own eyes to see? Well, I started a journal today (just with regular pen & paper) and I must say: I’ve never felt more self-concious about anything. Am I the only one who thinks it’s a bit weird? First, I’m contemplating what to write for about ten minutes and then, when I’m finally ready to write on that blank paper, I get crazy and feel like I’m about to ruin EVERYTHING. Like that beautiful blank paper. And like I can never take it back. Sure, I can take out the ruined page, but that journal will NEVER BE PERFECT AGAIN. Instead it will be tainted with crazy thoughts and me babbling about… well, what exactly?

So yes, I started a journal today. I went into town and bought one. I started the mental proces (staring at the blank page) and googled a bit on “how to journal” (I love me some wikihow). But I’m still not ready to put pen to paper.

Do you have a journal? What do you write about? And HOW on earth did you get started?

Posted in daily musings, dramaqueen | 16 Comments

About being invested in fictional ~love~

by Ashley Posted on October 8, 2012

In this post I shall open up about my embarrassing investment in fictional couples and discuss this concept a bit further, so if:

a) you are a sane person (or)
b) you want to be able to still think of ME as a sane person

you should probably skip this post (here are some cute kittens for you to look at). If you’ve decided to read on: welcome. Now, let’s talk.

It all started when a disturbing piece of news reached my delicate ears: one of the male lead-characters in one of my favorite British detectives decided to leave the show and do something less productive with his life (I’ll admit I’m a bit biased, but come on). Yes, I’m talking about Tom Ward a.k.a “heartthrob Harry” Cunningham of the hit-show Silent Witness. For more than ten years he played this character and for five of them, the writers built up a storyline around him and the female-lead Nikki. Of course the show was not about them, but eh, for me it kind of was. And now he is just gone. All this without even shooting a final episode! I’ve already lost my reputation by referencing a Celine Dion song in one of my previous posts, so I’ll just go ahead and say it: I’m sad! FIVE YEARS PEOPLE. And we did not even get a kiss! Sigh.

I realise I’m probably a bit more invested in this fictional relationship than I should. Maybe it means my mother dropped me on the head when I was a baby or that I shouldn’t have been allowed to watch soap operas as a kid. But is it wrong? Fact is, getting invested in fictional relationships is one of my many guilty pleasures. I did it with Ron and Hermione, I cried when Jim & Pam FINALLY got married (Jim looking into the camera just after they got married on the boat – TEARS ALL OVER), I’m still rooting for Chuck and Blair, I pined for Bob and Charlotte and I really wanted Luke and Lorelai to be together. Why do I “invest” in these relationships? Because it is fun! One problem though, is that it’s only fun for as long as it lasts. When an actor decides to leave a show or when a book comes to an end, the stories are gone and you’re the one left with all the feelings you “invested”.

Fortunately for “us people”, there is something like the internet! After finding out about Harry and doing a quick google-session, I came to the conclusion that I’m not the only one with these kind of feelings. If you have a favorite pairing, just try searching them on youtube. Chances are there is a video out there with a compilation of their “best moments”, all accompanied by a very dramatic soundtrack (turns out “Far Away” by Nickelback is a favorite of many and most of Miley Cyrus’ songs are PERFECT for this). Watch and marvel! Apparantly there are even people who decide to write (or rewrite) about their favorite fictional couples themselves. Thousands of stories about this magical world, all written by fans. I’ll admit I once spent a whole afternoon reading a Harry Potter fanfiction about Draco and Hermoine, which was suprisingly good (and perfectly PG13)! Because I should note that I DO draw the line at weird fanfiction or drawings. No disturbing sex scenes s’il vous plaît! If I wanted that I would just buy 30 shades of grey. I’m weird, but not THAT weird. (Yes, that does exist, my innocent grashopper. After all, it’s still the internet. If you want nightmares, take a look at this.) (hey, I warned you)

Oh well. I’ll probably miss my favorite couple when the new season of Silent Witness starts and yes, I’ll be a bit sad and therefore will replay this youtube video a few times, but I’ll be fine. As long as I don’t cry myself to sleep over it every night, I don’t consider it to be an unhealthy thing nor a “wrong investment”. It may suprise you after reading this post, but I am realistic enough to acknowledge my loss and move on ;-) (eventually)

Did your mother drop you as a baby? I.e. do you have a fictional couple in which you “invest”?

Posted in daily musings, dramaqueen, nonsensical references, pop pop pop, tv | 9 Comments

Not about Celine Dion. Well, maybe a little bit.

by Ashley Posted on September 19, 2012

As part of a project (read: expanding our “wall of fame” as well as finally adding some pages to our photoalbum) I’ve been browsing through all the pictures I made while I was abroad. Between all the new schoolstuff and my new job, I’ve hardly had the time to REALLY miss my stay in Sweden. With this project it’s hard to ignore. I don’t want to go all “Celine Dion” on you, but let’s just say that “it’s all coming back to me now” (I may or may not own a cd with this particular song on it, and I may or may not have belted it out way too many times while listening to it in the past). (Seriously, how funny is that musicvideo though. My tears have all dried as well Celine! Now let’s all get a 90′s cut and brush it in front of a mirror while being groped from behind and practice some bad acting!).

(ok, let’s focus)

Looking back, I made a lot of beautiful memories in Sweden. I’m not only talking about the big stuff (like my trip to Lapland, picture 1), but also about the small stuff (they had delicious breakfast-cereal at my favorite swedish supermarket). I loved my exchange, I love love love Sweden and I really want to go back some day. To everyone who is thinking about going on an exchange, I want to say: do it! You will not regret it! It’s hard and not always fun (yes, I cried), but you will never forget it. You will meet interesting people, get to know yourself really well and make some great memories. I had so much fun! You should go! (Leave that Celine Dion cd at home though, you don’t want to scare your new neighbours).

If anyone of you would like to see some more pictures I took during my 6 months in Sweden, let me know :-)

Posted in 90's child, daily musings, dramaqueen, nonsensical references, sweden | 17 Comments

just like honeyyyyy (a playlist)

by Ashley Posted on July 3, 2012

So, ok, I know I’m a day later with this than promised (Bear with me! My internet was failing me yesterday!), but here it is: my playlist, especially made for us dramaqueens who sometimes like to pretend they are playing the role of Charlotte in Lost in Translation. I made a cheesy collage to go with it, just for fun. Now, because my internet was failing me & because I turned out to be a bigger internet geek than I thought, my playlist is a bit short. But, here they are anyway, eight songs that are (in my opinion) dreamy and perfect for staring dramatically out of windows.

1. Girls – Death in Vegas

2. The Cure – Pictures of you

3. Kevin Shields – City Girl

4. Air – Alone in Kyoto

5. New Order – Ceremony

6. Neil Young – Old Man

7. The Radio Dept. – Pulling our weight

8. Jesus & Mary Chain – Just like honey



Posted in cinema, dramaqueen, granny hobby, playlist | 7 Comments